Sunday, July 22, 2012

Borderline Between Crazy And Insane

I'm tired of the hell I put myself and everyone around me through.
The combination of Borderline Personality Disorder and Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder is eating me alive, from the inside out.
I think I'm incapable of love.
I think I'm incapable of happiness.
I'm so completely lost.
I woke up this morning, emotionally exhausted and ashamed of last night's events.... again.
I know what today will bring, all too well, and I don't want to face it. I don't want to do anything, I don't want to try, I don't want to fight and I am so, so, so tired of crying I can't begin to explain it in any way that even vaguely resembles the rational side of me.
I'm tired of hurting the people I love. I know it's possible to get better, I know it's possible to live a life that appears normal.... But I don't know how in the hell I can ever hold on long enough to see that day come.
I'm exhausted.

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